Happy Birthday Kayla

Tomorrow my baby sister is turning 12 years old.  I can't believe how fast she is growing.  It's too fast!  I wish we could just freeze time.  I thought I would share a little piece of writing I wrote about six years ago.  I thought of fixing parts that I think could be better... But I decided to leave it exactly how I wrote it six years ago.  So here is a piece about the day Kayla was born, and the first time I seen her!

I love you so much baby sis!  Happy Birthday!!! :)

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The tears streamed from my eyes, blurring my vision. Holding her in my arms I could feel the gentle ‘thump, thump’ of her heart against my chest. I noticed my own racing heart and more tears flooding my already glistening face. Looking at her beautiful face, I felt an instant surge of love. I didn’t know it was possible to feel love so quickly for someone… but I had loved this baby girl before I had stepped foot into the room. I made a promise to myself, that minute, that I would always love and protect this baby girl. My baby sister…

Wednesday the 12th of June I received a phone call from my Step-Dad while I was at a friends house, “Your mum is in labour!”

I grabbed my sister, barely saying goodbye to our friends, and we ran all the way home. My Step-Dad drove my Mum to the hospital, leaving my younger sister, Christina, and I at home with our Gran. The minute we got in the door, Christina and I set to work making banners; “Welcome home Mummy and the new Baby,” “Congratulations,” “It’s a Girl,” and “It’s a Boy.” Along with some others. It was a great way to pass a few hours. However once we had finished, what were we to do then? I couldn’t even think about sitting still. I was so eager, so exited, so happy… but then so nervous, so worried, so anxious. So many emotions invaded my once calm body. When I thought of my mum in labour, or a new baby brother or sister I felt like I was going to explode with emotion. I had to stop thinking about it if I wanted time to pass. But it was all I could think about. Two hundred minutes to each hour, time was passing so slowly.

Finally, the phone rang at around midnight, “It’s a girl!”

Happiness soared through me. I have another sister! A baby sister… she’s here, and she’s healthy. I was also shocked because it was a baby girl, we had guessed that it was a baby boy. We had the name picked out for a boy, baby Cameron, but no girls name picked yet. We threw the “It’s a boy” banner into the bin and hung up the “It’s a Girl” banner.

In bed I lay staring into the darkness trying to force myself to sleep. I remembered nine months before, the day my Mum told my sister and I that she was pregnant. How scared she had been to tell us, and how shocked she was when we were happy. The past nine months had been brilliant. Watching my mums bump getting bigger and bigger, feeling her belly when the baby was kicking, helping my mum to put on her shoes… it was all wonderful. But I knew that it would be the next moments that would be the most memorable ones. She was here now!

When I awoke on Thursday morning I quickly threw my clothes on and then raced down the stairs, stumbling most of the way. I sat down for breakfast, barely able to keep still, my Gran had made a deliciously, mouth-watering fry-up. Scoffing down a variety of my favourite breakfast foods, I could barely taste them, unable to identify between a piece of bacon and a potato scone, it was clear that my mind was already in that hospital room, with my life giving mother and my new baby sister. Once we had eaten my Step-Dad drove the three of us to the hospital to see my mum and my new baby sister.

Walking down the corridor of the maternity ward every room was potentially my mum's room, so the butterflies continued for the whole walk (which seemed to go on forever). I remember trying to identify the scent that was lingering in the air… it seemed a different smell from any other time I had visited the hospital. It wasn’t the usual stench stinging my nose, but instead an appealing aroma that tickled my nostrils, enhancing my butterflies. My mum's room was sitting on it’s own at the end of the corridor. As I walked into the room, I looked at my mum. She looked so tired. Her mousy blond hair sat loose from the hair band that had struggled to hold it in place, her rosy red cheeks glistened where the sweat had once been, her green eyes sparkled where the tears had gathered, and her smile, the biggest, brightest, most beautiful smile I had ever seen her wear, was pasted across her face. She didn’t stop smiling that whole visit, even when Christina and I fought over who got to hold our new baby sister first.

“Her name’s Kayla,” my mum whispered as I was holding her in my arms.

Her little heart thump, thump, thumping against my chest, out of sink to my own heart beat. I just stared at her face… taking her in…My baby sister… baby Kayla.

Now, over six years later, I still vividly remember that wonderful day when I was first introduced to that baby girl. I still have more love for Kayla than I ever thought possible. I think back to the promise that I made myself the day Kayla was born, and I wonder if I have truly stuck to it. Have I protected Kayla? Have I been there for her? And the answer is, I have done my best… but although I do what I can to protect my baby sister, I feel that it is Kayla who protects me. Any time that I am feeling down or stressed, I just need to be around Kayla and I am reminded that everything else is meaningless. I have Kayla. I have everything I need. I have a wonderful, loving family and a baby sister who sees everything through innocent eyes. Kayla shows me everyday that she loves me, and I show her everyday that I love her, with our constant hugs and kisses. Kayla is a bubbly, silly, wonderfully funny little girl and I couldn’t imagine going through life without her. She is my world.